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She never saw herself after the surgery, bruised and swollen. All she saw were her obstacles that needed to be overcome, and she defeated them.

My mother still goes to therapies. She still cannot use her right arm, and she still has trouble making sentences due to Speech Aphasia and Speech Apraxia.

But here is what she can do: communicate with the barista at her favorite Starbucks in the Charleston Town Center Mall, drive her Jeep using a special device that helps her drive left-footed, walk without a cane, and sing her favorite songs while snapping to the beat.

All of these things seem so trivial, but you must remember — not long ago, she was considered dead. Forgot your password?

Click here to add your name, primary condition and basic information to be a valuable member. And get personalized content, just for you! Email Password.

Registration Benefits Emotional support Practical advice from others Topics that meet your needs Real survivor stories It's easy to signup; we do not share your data and the Support Network is user friendly.

I have read and agree to the Terms and Conditions. It is anti-spasmodic, anti-infectious, anti-viral, anti-bacterial, and anti-inflammatory, improves circulation, toning to liver, kidneys, spleen and improves overall body functions.

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It had been hard work: my mother can no longer walk or talk, so my days were spent cooking, cleaning, ferrying her around the house — from commode to wheelchair, to riser-recliner, to lavatory and back again — helping with her ablutions and therapies, ordering and administering medication, wrestling with GP practices and health trusts.

The biggest challenge was helping a fierce and wonderful matriarch who had always been so strong, fit and independent to accept a sudden and brutal new life in which everything has to be done for her.

A woman who was still cooking Sunday roasts, baking lemon drizzle cakes, going dancing on Wednesday afternoons and power-washing her own driveway became, in the brief moment it took a tiny clot to damage her brain, dependent on others for every aspect of her life.

It made sense for me to become her main carer: my sister has a nine-to-five job and lives in a one-bedroom house, whereas I, as a freelance writer, can be flexible.

So when Mum took the brave decision to try living back in her own home with significant input from carers, as well as from me and my sister , I expected my first night at home without her last Saturday to be a celebration of the by-now unfamiliar taste of freedom: a relief from the on-call responsibilities and worries of the past eight months.

Having dropped Mum back at her home and settled her in, I drove back to mine across the Yorkshire Wolds, sunshine blazing on fields of ripe corn and barley.

But here I was: exhausted, wan, sad and empty, sobbing on my step for all that has been lost. All of that lost.

And for me? A much-relished career as a journalist on hold, meeting friends and going out things of the past, a once-in-a-lifetime railway trip across Siberia cancelled, never a moment to myself — not even to brush my teeth or comb my hair, some days.

My life became an anxious parade of what-ifs every sleepless night, the days a blur of lifting and carrying, comforting and reassuring, trying to offer hope when I had none myself.

And, yet, something else had clarified inside me — something profound and unexpected. Worn down as I was, I had found a new purpose and fulfilment.

And I suspect there are many others who feel like me. There is a silent army of unpaid carers out there, most of whom are middle-aged women.

Of the 6. My life has never been a selfish one but it has been joyously free. I have never married — my choice, I never wanted it — and I have no children a thwarted story of miscarriage and illness because I really did want them.

A busy job on a Hong Kong newspaper? Yes please. A long sabbatical living on a sailboat in San Diego? A magazine editorship in London, requiring a mile move?

Count me in. And so it was that she came to stay with me, neither of us knowing how long for, both believing it was the only possible next step to try to help her find some stability in her life.

She was traumatised when she arrived with me and I tried to think of all the possible ways in which I might create moments of peaceful contentment, if not of joy, in this limited new life of hers.

I served her favourite foods: sticky toffee pudding with luxury custard; Thai green chicken curry with coconut rice; slices of buttered toast and hot chocolate in bed at 9pm to close her day.

So I felt privileged to have time with her to chew the fat: to watch films on what felt like stolen afternoons, to help with her speech and language therapy, to read the newspaper to her, to be a hand in the darkness post-stroke.

Not that it was plain sailing. I often saw an unpleasant, exasperated side of myself when I was tired.

But I will give myself credit for finding stamina, resilience and good cheer even on the toughest days.

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